Nine Things Which Appeared on The Muppet Show, But Wouldn’t Make It Onto Family Television These Days
3. War. A Muppet unit of World War One infantrymen, being shelled to pieces in their trench while singing a cheery rendition of “Why Can’t We Be Friends?”… Jesus Christ. The performance ends with Statler and Waldorf putting on German helmets and machine-gunning the stage. I swear to God I’m not making this up.
ROCK, ROCK, ROCK AND ROLL RECESS:
When I was volunteering at my son’s school recess on Wednesday I saw something similar. It began like something you’d see in grainy black and white footage documenting the early days of Beatlemania. The vast majority of the third grade came out of the building in a screaming pack. Soon I noticed that they all appeared to be chasing a boy named Isaac.
I started to worry about the safety of Isaac and the other kids. I asked my son Liam what was going on. “Isaac promised us that he would sing at recess!” he replied.
The Best Joni Mitchell Song Ever:
This is a love letter. To a love song. One I keep returning to. One I keep feeling I need to do justice to. I don't know if I can, but I'll try.
A couple of months ago, I'd gone back to playing it. Only I can't play it just once. I have to play it over and over again for hours on end. I can't get enough of it. It's not just a love song: It's a road song, it's a motel song, it's a Southwestern desert song, it's a disappearance and death song. It's a Joni Mitchell song. It's "Amelia."
People get that way about Joni Mitchell songs. Bob Dylan once told me that he'd written "Tangled up in Blue," the opening song of the much-celebrated Blood on the Tracks, after spending a weekend immersed in JM's Blue (although I think he may have been talking about the whole album, not just the song).